August 4th, 2010
You’re a difficult time.
The sun hasn’t peaked through the shutters yet, and you’re welcome by the alarm that does nothing short of alarm me out of my peaceful sleep.
You’re promising, but to handle you it’s best not to think; just act.
I had no idea you had so much company.
Dedicated runners galore pant their way down the street.
Cross country runners with waaaaay too much showing pride themselves in your hour.
I need a nap now that it’s 11 a.m.
but coffee with Granddaddy was well worth getting to know you, very early summer morning, a bit more.
I want to remember his surprise even though I told him I was coming.
(I guess he knows me and my morning struggles well).
I want to remember drawing Baylor campus on a napkin with an ink-happy green pen.
I want to remember Granddaddy remembering years back on end.
I want to remember Granddaddy getting so tickled about James reading his book on chess and Robert “doing his thing” which obviously is code for watching the Cardinals.
6 a.m. I’ll try to visit you soon.
See you.
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June 11th, 2010
Dear Community,
I don’t quite understand what all you entail, but I want to experience you. Sharing without an agenda is the glimpse you showed me tonight. Do keep sharing and thank you for being patient.
Love,
the student (who might need some tutoring; we’ll meet tomorrow and discuss it then)
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June 6th, 2010
Dear Memories,
Thank you. I treasure the gift of memory to record and reflect on the gift of life.
Love, Caroline
I keep a small red journal full of I want to remember…’s. This morning I started reading through some, and I’m so glad I have words to take me back to the little things that as a grandmother I will hold dear. It makes me want to record more. Here are a few examples:
Dear Robert,
I want to remember how at midnight you watched me walk to my car and then came ouside when someone walked up the street. You were there to protect, and I felt safe with you.
Dear 5 a.m.,
I want to remember driving home from Little Rock while James rapped and sang and mom danced. I want to remember Robert asleep in the back, arms sprawled around my neck twitching slightly as he drifted in and out of sleep.
And this morning,
I want to remember what it’s like to wake up easily before my alarm, make breakfast, read while looking at a backdrop of mountains and blue blue sky, and enjoy the morning with the Lord before church. I want to capture the feeling of not rushing so maybe it’ll slow me down. Church starts in 2 hours. My heart will be prepared.
Tired self,
I want to remember how you were rejuvenated this morning. Remember Philippians 2:12-13. ”Work out your Salvation with fear and trembeling, for it is God who works in you, both to will and to work for his good pleasure.”
“God not only expects me to do His will but He is in me to do it” -Oswald Chambers.
Find Rest in the Lord for it is the only place it can be found. Oh, Caroline, do remember that.
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