{Blessing #8}
I want to remember the peace I found curled up in my hammock on this surprise spring day. Peering up into this tree all I could think about is how downright tiny I am.
When I was little I would obsess on this topic. I would try to picture the earth as a piece of sand in God’s hand. In my mind I would zoom in to that piece of sand starting with North America, then the US, Missouri, and then into Springfield and inevitably my head would hurt so badly I would have to give up. I would then zoom out again and try to picture how big God was. I could never really picture God like I tried, but each time I realized he was bigger than I ever imagined.
Sometimes those moments when you realize that you’re not the center of the world and that being the center of your world isn’t all that great, are just what we need to place God back in the place of God within our hearts.
{Marriage 101 Guest Post by Meaghan}
God’s word tells us that marriage is a Big Deal. He uses the marriage metaphor over and over again to describe His own relationship with His Church.
In the Old Testament, God compares Israel to His bride. Sometimes she is beautiful and lovely, but often God pleads with adulterous Israel to return to Him.
In Jeremiah, God reminds His bride Israel of her first days:
I remember the devotion of your youth,
your love as a bride,
how you followed me in the wilderness…
Jeremiah 2:2
In Hosea (an entire book about God’s marriage metaphor), God tells Israel:
And it shall be, in that day,
That you will call Me ‘My Husband,’
… I will betroth you to Me forever;
Yes, I will betroth you to Me
In righteousness and justice,
In loving-kindness and mercy…’”
Hosea 2:16, 19-20
In the New Testament, things get even more beautiful. Check out Matthew 25, where Christ compares the Kingdom of Heaven to virgins waiting for the bridegroom (that’s Jesus!) to come for them, or Revelation 19:7-9, where we are invited to the Marriage Supper of the Lamb!
Now, miracle of miracles, when we enter into marriage, we participate in this great metaphor. For those who are called to it, earthly marriage provides us a way to better understand Christ’s relationship with the Church (for those called to singleness, God has other wonderful lessons in store!).
In my short six months of marriage to my husband Greg, I’ve started to see some of these 3 lessons.
I thought I was doing pretty well with submission, and then I got married. To a boy. A fallible, human boy who asks me to do things like put the pot on the back burner (I promptly set it on the front burner) and pray out loud (but I pray in pictures!). We’re still working out what mutual submission looks like, but I know that submission to my husband is making me better able to submit to my Lord. Submitting to a physical person is good practice for submitting to an invisible God!
Whether it’s getting up early so my husband can make it to class, cheerfully putting down my blogging to help him work, or laying down my desire to be pouty to be forgiving and cheerful, marriage is daily sacrifice for someone else. In each little sacrifice, I conquer my will to do these things because I love Greg.
God’s sacrifice for His bride was ultimate – He gave His own life. These little sacrifices for my husband – and the big ones we know are to come – teach me in small measure about God’s sacrifice for us.
Oh, don’t get me started on how amazing and beautiful covenant is. (Focus, Meaghan, focus.) God’s love for His Church is a covenantal love upheld by God Himself, not us. It doesn’t matter how good or bad we’ve been; God loves us.
In our wedding, I promised to love Greg for the rest of our lives, no matter what. Working out this love day by day – seeing how Greg loves me when I am unlovable, and doing the same for him – is giving us the tiniest taste of the incredible love God has for us, His Church.
__
These ideas of comparing my marriage to Greg with this grand, cosmic marriage were, at first, quite overwhelming to me. How could I be stepping in to a role that echoes that of Christ’s Church? I am a fallible, sinful human being not capable of loving Greg properly.
The great, wonderful, amazing thing about being part of the Church is that God gives me mercy and grace to love that way. He gives Greg and me the ability to love one another. He forgives my wrongs and forms me into a person who can be His bride: pure and unblemished. Amen!
As a practical step towards ingesting these realities for yourself, take a trip over to BibleGateway.com. Do a word search for “bride,” “marriage,” “wife,” or “husband.” You’ll have to wade through “So-and-so married so-and-so,” but you’ll also get a great picture of God’s love for His people and a broader picture of marriage. Enjoy!
Meaghan and Greg have been married for a whole six months, and are currently tackling (punching, wrestling, and pleading with) grad school for PhDs in bioengineering and chemistry. Meaghan blogs about faith, graduate school, dance, and kitchen (mis)adventures at xorosxaris.wordpress.com.
I am THRILLED to announce that tomorrow launches a new blog series on marriage.
Marriage 101– insight from those who have walked (& stumbled) before us.
Amidst wedding planning, color-picking, flower-choosing, & invitation-designing, the most undeniably, important part of engagement is preparing for marriage. Colors will be forgotten, flowers will die (should I just use silk?), and invitations will be tossed.
I’m learning all I can because I’m hyper-aware of my own short-comings, and I’m marrying my best friend in 3 months who is also well… human.
After asking everyone I could “what advice can you give me?” I realized the answers I was hearing were chalk full of insight and timeless wisdom– wisdom that must be captured for others to hear. Thus, the birth of this blog series.
Whether you’re single, engaged, just married, or you’ve been married so long you can’t remember not being married, these posts will encourage. I pray they will draw you to the heart of God, as each post in its own way continually reiterates how a good marriage is founded upon Christ who calls us to humbly love one another.
I’m stoked. I hope you are too. Let’s learn together.
[do you have wisdom to share from your journey? I'd love to help you share your story. email me at caroline.gear[at]gmail.com for details!]
I will go on a “Valentine’s Day Date” with my favorite person in the world.
When it comes to sappy, I am the queen.
I love cheesy romantic gestures. I treasure the hours spent helping my brother make a Valentine’s Word Search for his first girlfriend. I loved secret admirers and quirky gift exchanges.
I love holidays, I love flowers just like every girl, and I love love.
It’s not the day’s fault. We should celebrate the one we’re committing our lives to and going to spend forever with. We should set time aside for the warm, sentimental moments that make our heart race. We need to celebrate our partner because in the next week they are probably going to drive us up the wall, lead us to tears, or make us question our own sanity as we stomp out of the room.
But, we don’t dwell on the latter reality. It is the warm, sappy moments that we—especially young women—envision and crave. We picture candle lit dinners, petals on the floor, classical music mysteriously coming out of the walls [or, whatever other cliché picture comes to mind when you think of a romantic Valentine’s Day!].
(unless you’re in a scripted Hollywood romantic comedy on the 20th take of the scene!).
I cried at every birthday party all through elementary school. My tears came with such clockwork that my mom applauded me the first year I didn’t cry. I would wait so long for my party and the anticipation would build for the best night of the year to celebrate ME. When it came and didn’t live up to the Mary-Kate and Ashley hype in my mind, I cried.
I think that’s a bit like Valentine’s Day. For some who are single, Valentine’s Day has evolved into a focus on what is missing for idealized, romantic moments. For those in relationships, the expectation for those same idealized, romantic moments remains unmet… because we don’t live in a movie.
Align your expectations with reality and save your heart. Valentine’s Day is an excuse to buy chocolate for yourself and friends. It’s a reminder to love and cherish those around you. And that’s all.
It is not a reminder you are single. It is not a reminder that your spouse isn’t romantic. It’s not a reminder you don’t have much money or that you have to work too much.
It’s a happy and simple thing. It’s merely a random Tuesday with chocolate. Let anything beyond surprise you—not be the expectation.
A special welcome if you’re visiting from Preston’s blog! Feel free to poke around and subscribe on the right if you’d like. I’d be honored.
If you’re a regular reader, hop on over to Preston’s blog to see my post about the beautiful church. Here is an excerpt in the meantime~
Children wander the streets and congregate in the church
parking lot. When I pull my car up four
times a week, the kids flock with an excitement that seems be God saying, “Caroline, here are my children; now, bring
them to Me.” Sometimes I feel like “the mission” is just as much for me
relearning—daily—the Gospel of Christ.I am surrounded by more non-Christians while at church than
I am anytime throughout the week. These
non-Christians in church humble me to the core, but they remind me of what I
have—and the only thing I have—The
Gospel. They remind me that what I
have received changes everything, and they
remind me how desperately I need to spill the Hope of Christ with every
opportunity.Yes, we need to share the Gospel with those who haven’t
heard it, but perhaps the Gospel also should be repeated, shared, and quoted to
us who know Christ just as often. When the Gospel rolls off our lips and
conveyed through our love, it transforms us.
It has transformed me.
I love and treasure the Gospel
more now because of the inexplicable beauty of seeing it hit the ears of those
within my church.
This coming Saturday my closest friends– my Texan bridesmaids– and I are running the Hot Chocolate 5k/15k. I’m stoked. We’re all running the same race, but we’re training with completely different goals.
On Friday after running 10 miles I could barely bring myself to walk the .25 back to my house. I made it to my front porch and immediately fell asleep in a lawn chair– who knew you could go from exercising to napping so quickly? Probably not so healthy.
Back in the day I quit in the middle of a race and sat down. Yes, sat down on the sideline. Thus, my goal is to cross the 15k finishline… and not immediately fall asleep.
Hanna is trying to complete the 15k fast. She doesn’t do anything without 110% plus some.
Catie might be running the 5k for the chocolate and fondue at the end of the race.
The 5k will be Nincy’s first race. She’s been working diligently to get up to 3 miles– each run she’s so close but she keeps coming up short. This morning she called herself pathetic for not making it 3 miles.
Boy, I’ve felt like that. If I dwell on it too much, I can let Hanna’s goal of running faster get to me too, just like most people would love to have Nincy’s discipline of running 2.5 miles every day.
I know Nincy can run 3.1. Easily. The laws of running tell me she can. But, I also know that the world keeps turning whether or not she makes it, and the world will keep turning if I stumble across the 15k finish line within an hour (yea right!) or 3 hours.
I’m such a fan of goals. I keep them before me always; they keep me disciplined. But, I also know that goals can be the strongest voice of condemnation in my life. They tells me lies as my head hits the pillow, reminding me that I didn’t do what I wanted to do.
Self-esteem should never be dependent upon 6/10′s of a mile or a matter of minutes or… a few pounds, grades, a bank statement, or a job.
We are all going to put our best foot forward (a million times over!), and step-by-step all 4 of us are going to cross the finish line. And no matter how we do, there’s going to be chocolate at the end.
In the words of my fiance who keeps me in check, it’s about the process not the result.
It’s about training, not the time.
It’s about a healthy lifestyle, not the scale.
It’s about sharing the gospel, not the conversion.
It’s about education, not the grade.
May goals be our friends & keep us from sitting down during the race, but never be the holder of self-esteem.
Run on.
After spending time with the Lord this morning, I left with my soul refreshed.
Gift #7: The Word.
The opportunity to meet with the Creator of the universe each morning is an honor, privilege, certainly a reason to rejoice. Amen?
As I had my Bible sprawled across my lap in one of the cliche Christian moments [complete with a cup of coffee!], I was reminded of a project my friend Jill is doing.
Not everyone has a Bible to read…. or 5 like I do. Not everyone can daily commune with the Lord through His Word. Not everyone can get to Mardel and pick up a new one when the binding gives out.
and Jill is doing something to help. By doodling fancy pictures like the one above, she’s working to translate a book of the Bible for the Ehty people in South Asia who don’t have the Bible in their own language. She’s inspiring because she’s actually doing something, and she’s empowering because she’s letting us partake.
I’m jumping on board, and I encourage/dare you to too. It’s a way to take one of our gifts and give a gift to someone else.
Check out her site for some cool drawings and see what she’s doing to… change the world for an entire group of people. Here’s the link!
I’ve become somewhat obsessed with a new workout class called Body Pump. You must try it.
For the past 4 weeks I’ve gone 3 times a week and stood in the exact same spot. Mirrors line the front of the room, so as you’re dying from the workout, you also conveniently watch yourself die. At the end of the class you feel great, but watching yourself die for 3 hours a week is painful, especially since there’s no elegant way to struggle lifting weights.
Today, I moved across the room, and as I faced the mirror I realized I looked completely different. Whoa.
Another girl in the class noticed my confusion, and said “oh! The mirror where you normally stand is distorted. I never stand there!” The distorted mirror made me extra short and stocky to say the least, but I had stood there for so long I believed its lies and was then surprised by the truth.
We look in mirrors constantly throughout the day and not just ones with a physical reflection. We use mirrors to see ourselves– see how we’re doing, how we are measuring up, whether or not we’re making enough money, working out enough, being productive enough.
What other distorted mirrors do you look into daily? They’re everywhere. Comparisons with Ms. Fashion, self-doubt, striving for perfection, the happy-go-lucky FRIENDS lifestyle, & the happily-ever-after Belle romance are just some among many. We live our lives in a not-so-fun “Fun House.”
He says that you are a chosen child of God, redeemed, loved dearly, and He has a purpose for you complete with a plan He’s orchestrating now for your future.
Linger a while in front of that mirror. How refreshing truth can be.
The Proposal
Engagement Story Pt. 1
Capturing Childhood Memories
Self-Made Measuring Stick
Why Valentine’s Day Can Suck
I love to write, but I am too timid to write my own about me. 
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